Friday, August 29, 2008

Dan Quayle with Tits

I called this pick several months ago.  My methodology literally consisted of combing Wikipedia for the youngest, most fuckable looking female Republican in government.

I'm guessing Mccain's selection process was similarly thorough.

What struck me about Palin then and still excites me now is that she bares an uncanny resemblance to the large tittied, glasses-wearing cougars who populate a porn site I occasionally obsessively frequent:

Big Tits at School

Here's how I see a potential high-level meeting between Palin and Mahmoud Ahmadinejad going...

Ahmadinejad:  Look -- I know I have this undeserved rep of being like a megalomaniacal douche, but I honestly think Iran's been unreasonable lately.  I understand some of the American complaints.  I do.  Let's open open up a dialogue here.

Palin:  I'm so fucking wet.

Ahmadinejad:  I'm sorry?  It hasn't rained in a fortnight.

Palin:  Let me see that fat cock.

Ahmadinejad:  Excuse me?

Palin:  You heard me.  You got an F on this test.  And there's only one way you can improve your grade.

Ahmadinejad: Yes yes -- you're referring to the low grade of the uranium we once sought to enrich.  Years ago.  Not any more.  We clearly passed that test.  I'm telling you, I'm a new man. I mean I had matzah ball soup the other night.  No joke.  Amazing.  Those delicious little fluffy balls. Yeah you know what -- I think I've been a little too rough on the Hebrews in the past.  No?

Palin:  Cum on my tits.  Cum all over my tits! 

Ahmadinejad:  "Cum on your tits?"  Is this honestly the level of discourse you're chosing to engage on?

Palin:  Dude, just cum on them.

Ahmadinejad:  Sarah, I worry that you're reinforcing negative stereotypes about--

Palin:  Just.  Cum.  On.  Them.

Ahmadinejad: Okay.