Thursday, February 11, 2010

Jay Radulavic, Uninspired Time Traveler

"Got a nice package on a real cheap round trip to The Good Guys! on Westwood and Pico circa 2000. Forgot how pushy those tie-wearing salesman were. Highlight of my stay: bought a 9-inch portable DVD player for $1400 before tax. Which was only 8% in CA back then. It's 8.25 now."

"Just booked my first trip using an online time travel agent. Went back to UCLA circa 04. Somehow the trip got a little screwy date-wise and I ended up arriving the night after I got dumped by this girl I'd been seeing for a year or so. Needless to say, I was depressed the whole trip. Couldn't eat. Lost 6 pounds and my skin got super dry. On the upside, got to relive a conversation with my sociopathic ex-roommate in which I sort of predicted - with a few major caveats - the iPod Touch. Also, my grams hadn't died of cancer just quite yet, so I got to sort of redo the whole visiting her in hospice thing."

"Was contemplating either a trip back to the time of homo sapien / neanderthal co-habitation or a jaunt to the Globe Theatre circa 1610 to catch a live performance of Lear, but then my brother-in-law who's a real avid snowboarder (surfer too) reminded me that Ralphs used to offer 50% off coupons to the local Los Angeles ski resorts that you could cut right out of the shopping bags. So we ended up going back to do just that and then took a 2-hour road trip to Mountain High circa 1992. Unfortunately, snowboards were banned on the mountain back then. My brother-in-law was very agitated about this. In fact, he more or less took out his anger on me which I did not appreciate. Not one ounce. So anyway, we rented skis. On one of the lifts, I met a shy, balding thirty-something violin teacher named Paul. I ended up getting his number, the idea being that I would maybe take violin lessons from him at a later date. This would result in a rip in the fabric of space-time whereby instead of directing a failed short film my senior year of high school, I focused solely on music before realizing I didn't have enough natural ability and giving up on the violin summer before college. Also, my brother-in-law and I got in a minor fender-bender on the way home from the mountain. He sort of blamed me for the accident even though he was the one driving."

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